How To Deal With Rejection
“There is no rejection, only divine protection or redirection.”
When opportunities start to show themselves to you, you should be showing out too! Putting yourself out there is an exhilarating feeling. Whether you're telling your crush you like them or interviewing for a new job, it's all about taking risks to get what you want. But what happens when things don’t go as planned? When your crush says no to that date, or you don’t get the job, what do you do?
Rejection, while scary, is a natural (and necessary) part of life. I remember working tirelessly for a huge networking opportunity and then getting denied over email. I was heartbroken. But looking back, I realize I just wasn’t ready. There were so many things holding me back from tapping into my full potential. That moment of rejection ended up being the wake-up call I needed. The reflection that followed helped me grow into someone I’ve always wanted to be.
So how do you deal with being rejected from something you thought was the perfect fit? And more importantly, how can you embrace it? Here are five tips to help guide you through the process.
5 Ways to Deal With Rejection:
1. Self-Reflect
If you're not used to rejection, your first instinct might be to cry. But if you use self-reflection as your first step, things might feel a little easier. Dr. Kristie Norwood, a licensed clinical psychologist and director of the student counseling center at Hampton University, says her go-to for dealing with rejection is to start by reminding yourself who you are. What skills did you have before the rejection? What strengths do you still possess? Focus on what you have, rather than what you think you missed out on.
2. Distract Yourself
Productively distracting yourself is one of the best ways to move on (key word here is productively). Kyla, a second-year student at Hampton University, says you should “center yourself and make life all about you.” Try finding a hobby that contributes to your skills development like reading, drawing, or playing chess. There’s no point in dwelling on things you can’t control, so try to move forward by focusing on your growth.
3. Rejection Is Redirection
Olani, a first-year student at George Washington University, says one of the best ways to get over rejection is to “wholeheartedly believe that what you don't get is not meant for you.” The phrase “rejection is redirection” is something I stand by and it means that while you might’ve not gotten that job, or that person, it just wasn’t meant for you—at least not yet.
Trust that a no is actually pushing you forward, not holding you back. Something better is coming, and you’ll be redirected to something bigger than what you were initially hoping for.
4. Find The Lesson
Take this time to look at your shortcomings as a lesson. Yes, that might sound super annoying, but it’s a great opportunity for growth. Actively reflect on your experience. Ask yourself: What can I do differently next time? What lessons can I take away from this experience? Recognizing areas where you can improve will help you bounce back better and stronger than ever.
5. Surround Yourself With Positivity
Lastly, try surrounding yourself with people who love and accept you—you are the energy you keep around you (or as the OGs say, “birds of a feather flock together”). Spending time with friends, family, or mentors who uplift you, will help shift your mindset into a positive one.
And when you think of rejection, try thinking of rebirth instead. Remember, it’s just a bump in the road, not the end of it.
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